/r/Buddhism

How can I be kind to another when I'm so distraught and dragged by the crazy mood swings and challenges life brings me especially at the ripe age of 16? I feel as though on better days I may train myself to remember to be kind to others, but my short memory has brought me to completely forget, not how, but the value as to why I ought to be kind.

I was having a miserable day. Felt like my dearest friend in the world was distancing himself from me and I had a gazillion things I have to study for and work on to prevent dropping below a "C" in... And out of the clear blue a friend of mine who saw me last when I was in complete focus on kindness- and this friend came up to me and the first thing she said was, "I hope you have an brilliant day." I think that just kind of reminded me the value of kindness.

Yet how do I make it last? How do I do this if I can't yet train myself into meditation no matter how hard I try? I want to take things a certain pattern, reach my enlightenment in a way that sees me an overall happier and more enlightened person even before I begin meditation. Can that work?

I'm super tired- I apologize if anything I posted above doesn't make sense.

I'm in the process of working out my summer holiday and Bhutan is one country I've not been to. Researching it, they require a 200 - 250 USD per day "tariff". I'm trying to work out how many days I would need to get a feel and what temples people would most recommend.

Also, if anyone could recommend some reading to help me understand the type of Buddhism they practice, I'd appreciate it. (I did a Google search and was a bit overwhelmed.)

I can give other examples, some explicit like this one, others more implicit, but it seems many people who've spent their lives either practicing or thinking about (or both) Buddhism, believe it's really about nonduality/oneness/universal consciousness.

Video

Posters here very knowledgeable about Buddhist doctrine claim adamantly Buddhism is about reincarnation, yet when I go to youtube, it seems most of the 'masters' either explicitly or fairly clearly implicitly talk about oneness, not separate reincarnation.

I'm in no position to conclude anything myself, being new to Buddhism and eastern philosophy/religion in general, so I'm really not sure what to believe.

I guess no one can lay claim to knowing what Buddhism is really about. "There are neither one nor many." Statements like that are very hard to decipher with any kind of certainty.

I am currently a daily practicer of buddhism, been studying as much as i could to the means of my acknowledgements...This is what i've got so far from his messages/techings/rules:

Happiness&death are the same thing, because they are a means to an end.

Suffering&Change are the same thing, because they are a means for time/existence.

I know it's not word for word, nor your acknowledgement...i'm okay with that :) aka BRAIN FART 1

I was organizing a party for a friend and another friend said I was doing it incorrectly. I was asked by every in a crude way to stop and it really struck me as I didn't expect it.

I felt deflated after it and found myself trapped in an existential crisis.

How can I better react? What might Buddha suggest?

Shinzen Young has been one of my favorite teachers for years. He does a great job of explaining Buddhist concepts in a way that make it easy to understand, and this talk is a good example of his style. Highly recommended.

This is from the radio station KPFK's archive. The first talk is by Alan Watts, another good teacher. Shinzen's talks start about an hour in.

I swear. I've studied Buddhism for years but this subreddit is a major turn off. Not that it matters, but you guys seem to pay more attention to correcting each other or whining about what is or isn't welcome on the sub more than any other sub I subscribe to. Why is that?

This post is, at its core, about a girl...a girl I dated and then lost (due to a cross-coastal move). 2 years later, I am back in the same city as she is but she is currently going through a bad breakup and she is not ready for a serious relationship again yet. She said she can see being with me in the future but right now needs time for herself. I understand this completely but the little bit of hope is causing me to go insane.

I want to change the way I look at the situation. Rather than waking up everyday hoping today will be the day she changes her mind and is ready, I want to wake up ready to live in the present, accepting that I can not and should not try to control her decisions, and understanding that what I need to focus on is the present, the things I can control in my own life.

Are there any good practical Buddhist or non-Buddhist books or writings related to mindfulness, specifically in terms of living your life day to day and focusing on your current happiness, rather than pining for what might or might not come to be in the future? Thank you! :-)

Would anyone be interested, or is it "too materialistic" a proposition? In any case, I need money, because I'm moving to a more expensive country and if I moved the books I wouldn't be able to even afford the luggage extra costs. (They're outrageous.)

Books include:

Zen Teaching of Huang Po

Swampland Flowers - Zen Letters and Lectures (Master Ta hui)

Ch'an master Hui Hai - Zen Teaching of Instantaneous Awakening

The Awakening of Faith in the Mahayana

Zen Flesh, Zen Bones

Soko Morinaga - Novice to Master

Zen Teachings of Yuanwu

Collected works of Shinran

Vimalakirti Nirdesa Sutra

Lankavatara Sutra (Red Pine edition)

And so on, and so on. PM me for full list.

Collection includes only "A grade" stuff, which means, accounts from the most important Chinese Zen masters, the original early teachings, and the best studies. I also have the Collected Works of Shinran if anyone's interested.

All these fundamental books I've been collecting across these years of my Buddhist studies. I need to focus on other things in my life now, livelihood, materially sustaining my wife & myself, and I think that charging below Amazon price will be a good bargain for you. All books are in perfect shape except some are underlined (but with non-permanent pencil - which I can erase if so desired).

This was misrepresented by the OP.

They were not baby monks, they were children whose parents joined them in the festivities for Buddha's birthday in Korea. A few weeks before the celebration, they start practicing their performance and have their heads shaved.

They are also doing the Korean hands over the head heart, just to be cute.

EDIT: Apparently, they do spend a week or two at the temple, but they are still not monks...

I'm finding it difficult to know whether or not, in many situations, whether to act or not to act. For example. Someone I somewhat know walks down the street and says "hi". Do I engage them in further conversation or continue to let them walk on by? Someone raises a political opinion that I disagree with. Do I confront them and argue my case, or simply let them be and not disturb the universe? I think of a joke that might make people laugh. But jokes come with risks which could lead to feelings of insult and suffering. Do I tell it or do I hold back to preserve the peace of the world?

How can you know whether to act or whether not to act in this world?

I need your help reddit sangha, i've got something stuck in my craw:

Let's say boom, everybody sees the (moon) light, goes Buddhist, and undertakes the contemplative life to reap its fruits: Everybody is monks/nuns.

Well, the 100% bhikkus, drinking strained water and not toiling in the fields nor hunting nor fishing, have a good chance of starving to death with no lay people to bring them alms. But, even if they pick enough berries to avert starvation, with no offspring to carry forth, then there's nobody left to spread the dhamma, strive to save all beings, etc. Humanity is extinct and the dhamma is lost for a million years until the dolphins or sasquatches or parrots have a few of their own wake up and start it all over again, again.

Seems to me to that lay followers are essential to Buddhism surviving, but I can't recall any teachings that actually speak of the need for the lay path (directly, not just implied).

Anybody know of any works/commentaries/anything discussing this existential dilemma?? Any help appreciated.

Thanks in advance, homejam

I'm beyond inspired and perplexed by the idea of Buddhism. I had always dismissed it as simply another religion until I saw mention in /r/atheism. I have sense been seeking knowledge in every avenue. I'm currently reading The Buddhist Handbook and Everyday Zen, and i'm astounded. The beauty and tranquility i've found in these pages have inspired me in my daily life. I'm a recovering drug addict and i've been looking for secular support outside of my 12 step fellowship and I seem to have found the key. I have found a few meditation centers in my area (DFW, TX) but everything on the websites resembles the FAQs here. I'm nervous to go to the building by myself and most of my friends are either militant atheists or members of another faith and won't consider it. I'm not asking for someone to accompany me or anything like that, i'm just looking for some more information, good places to go - there's not really any reviews except about the outside appearances of the temples/centers.

TL;DR Newly intrigued Buddhist seeks center in DFW, TX area and information about where to go/ what to look for. sounds like a craigslist personals ad haha